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i don't agree with all of how this reads, just thought it was pretty darn funny

LMAO!!! READ IT ALL...


The Man Rules



At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down.

Finally, the guys' side of the story (I must admit, it's pretty good).

We always hear 'the rules' from the female side ..

Now here are the rules from the male side.



These are our rules!


Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday is for Sports!
It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and Void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, PLEASE say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched..
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... REALLY!

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or motor sports.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh!

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them an even bigger laugh

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If you want boys to answer this then post "BOYS ONLY"
If you want girls to answer this then post "GIRLS ONLY"
If you want BOTH to answer this then post "BISEXUALS"
Be completely honest.

What would you do if?
1. I was right next to you:
2. I kissed you:
3. I lived next door to you:
4. I started smoking:
5. I was hospitalized:
6. I was drunk:
7. I hugged u:
8. I asked you to leave:
9. I asked you out:

What do you think about my?
10. Personality:
11. Eyes:
12. Hair:
13. Body:

Would you?
14. Be my friend?
15. Keep a secret if i told you one?
16. Kiss me?
17. Go on a date with me?
18. Keep in touch?
19. Date me?
20. Have sex with me?

Have you ever?
21. Lied to make me feel better?
22. Wanted to kiss me?
23. Wanted to bite me?
24. Kept something important from me?
25. Wanted to cuddle with me?

More.
26. Who are you?
27. Are we friends?
28. When and how did we meet?
29. Describe me in one word:
30. What was your first impression?
31. What reminds you of me?
32. If you could give me anything what would it be?
33. How well do you know me?
34. When's the last time you saw me?
35. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
36. Are you gonna post this so you can see what I say about you